sitting in the camper

May 04, 2022

Hey, It’s me again. It’s been a while.

How are you?

It’s been a long winter. Lots of snow. Lots of skiing and travel. I went to Canada and skied wonderful big mountains with good people. I ate poutine and drank caesars and ketchup potato chips.

I bought a camper and am now currently in it.

I am in Fruita, CO. 18 Road campsite and one of the best (now unkept) secrets in the mountain biking world, to be precise.

Also, my furnace stopped working again for no apparent reason, about three hours ago.

I have all the resources to see what’s wrong with it: internet (spotty and weak through my hotspot on my phone), a very rudimentary birds eye knowledge of the furnaces workings. I also have at my disposal not one, but two, screwdrivers and a drill with which to get into trouble with, and a recently emptied bottle of wine.

I am trying to decide whether I will make it through the night comfortably in my Not Zero Degree Sleeping Bag Which Is Actually A Comforter (since I left my zero degree bag at home, in storage, scoffing at the idea of needing it) or if I shall be forced to put on layers of clothing and count the hours shivering on my three Inch memory foam mattress topper, which becomes rock-like in it’s usage as a sleeping platform around 32 degrees Fahrenheit.

The rain is pouring.

My bike is getting wet.

The camper is getting slowly colder.

The furnace refuses to acknowledge my needs.

Also, did I mention my bike is getting wet?

At this point I wonder if this is how the cast of the movie Alive felt when they were pretending to be people that actually ate each other in the Andes Mountains to survive but were really on a set making a movie: Sitting in trailers learning their lines, and wondering if the furnace would go out on them for no apparent reason and cause them to write in their blogs instead of act.

Probably not.

Anyways, aside from the furnace’s “sail switch” going out (as my rudimentary google search informs me), I am good. I am peachy. Anna and I have various injuries: her back and my shoulder being the worst of them, but we soldier on. Albeit we soldier on like two active old people complaining about their injuries at the dinner table. At my age I have decided that I shall enjoy the good and the bad, the stresses, the brushes with fame and with death. Death being a lot closer these days than fame, but I digress.

I must say, as I watch a young couple a few campsites away from me struggling with their now-wet tent and dog and gear and bikes and firewood, that the camper, although priced incredibly, ridiculously high, has been a good investment. I am sure with all these headaches, all these “just one more tweak or fix or purchase and this will be perfect” ways of thought, I will throw up my hands in disgust one day and sell the thing. Probably making more than what I paid for it in this market, and enough to fund the economy of a small country. But again, I digress.

Anyways, thanks for checking in, you two, you know who you are. Mahalo!

Written by Corey Smaller Follow me on Instagram